A freeloader.

It has been sunny all day, but then the rain pours down as if the sky understands what I feel. I’ve been holding up, but then I can’t help but burst all the tears down.

***

She woke up with dizzy fuzzy head. Puffy eyes too, her eyes were sore. Not that she cared. The only one that stung so bad she couldn’t ignore was inside her chest. The place where she put him so deeply, so dearly.

So deep, until sometimes it’s hard to reach in and express the feeling the way it should. So dearly, until intentions to smother him near were the only thing that came out.

She knew she couldn’t blame him.

He was just too nice, too warm, too cozy. Too everything that made her feel welcomed every time they locked eyes.

But that morning she realised one thing. That she had overstayed her welcome. She was a free-loader. Came knocking his door with nothing to give in arms and asking for so much in return.

She also knew, ‘now’ was too late to offer him anything back, except the space she occupied for too long in him. So she walked out through the door. Trying to hold it all together until the time he decides to open up again.

***

I look up to the sky. Hoping I would be able to send you my sorry through it.
I'm sorry, I truly do.

***

"All I have, I will give to you
In dark times when no one wants to
I will give you me
And we'll be
Us

All I have, I will give to you
In dark times when no one wants to
I will give you me
And we'll be
Us
And there's no one else

Who knows me
Like you do
All I've done, you've done too
The walls I
Hide behind
You walk through
You just walk through

Well I know all the words
To take you apart
You know I know you're hurt
I want to mend your heart
You're broke down
Why don't you tell me from the start?
You know I know you're hurt
I want to mend your heart
And there's no one else."

--Our Song, The XX.